Let's Potty!

Today is March 23rd, 2020 and we are all enduring the Corona Virus pandemic.  Most of America is hanging out at home (hopefully) and many of us are probably bored, climbing the walls, looking for things to do, eating 17 meals a day and trying like hell to not drink alcohol before 5pm.  And that's ok - as long as we stay home!  In my quest for projects, I decided to take a look at my unpublished blog posts and found this little gem that I never got around to finishing.  I started writing it in 2016 (I think!) and thought what the heck... let's finish it.  So here we go....


2016
This is my first sequel and I'm so excited!  Remember Patsy's 24 hour bathroom makeover? If not, click here

Well, the time has come to re-do the makeover. Is that an oxymoron? (Careful - it's been a while and I use big words now. I also discovered gambling, but that's another story for another time).

Why are you re-doing your bathroom AGAIN, you ask?  There is one very simple answer to this question:  It's gross.

Since our house was built in 1776, our walls, for the most part, are plaster. When we updated the bathroom 10+ years ago, we did not gut it like we should have. So, those lovely plaster walls have just sucked up all of the yuckiness in life and it is time to be rid of them!  Sayonara! Adios!

Game Plan:
Demo DeMo DEMO!
Rip out EVERYTHING! Tub, toilet, vanity, walls, floor, ceiling.... Get down to the bones!!

Brian the Builder is being called in on this renovation. Typically projects like this, the Hubs and I tackle....BUT, we're tired!  Can you blame us?  So we are going to pay Brian to do part of this. Money. We have to pay him money. I tried to pay him with food and booze like The Dustin but he looked at me like I was bat-shit crazy. So, I'm still confused but whatever.

Back to the game plan... After the demolition, we are going to make the bathroom bigger by extending it past the hall closet and going into the spare bedroom closet and then installing a pocket door. So now, the bathroom closet will be INSIDE the bathroom. WINNING! Sorry, neighbors to the west. No more peepshows.

Once we have enlarged the bathroom, we will proceed to:

-Install a door.  Every bathroom should have a door....WITH A LOCK.  In this case, it will be a pocket door.

-Install a new, bigger, deeper and oh so wonderful new tub and surround that doesn't have little green men growing out of it.

-New toilet.  I'm sure that baby won't stay new for long :(

-New vanity, custom-built by our pals at Northland Custom Woodworking Inc.

-New Flooring

-Wood ceiling & crown molding

Chapter 987

We've done a lot of demo and home improvements to our house over the past decade and this demo was by far, one of the worst things we've ever had to do.  It was pure, rotten, smelly hell.  Grandpa George did one heckuva job putting up those plaster walls and they were not going to be falling down anytime soon.  In fact, they were probably helping to hold up the roof.  He was laughing his ass off at us trying to knock those suckers down... I'm sure he howled when we broke a sledge hammer.  Yes, we seriously BROKE the sledge hammer trying to rip down one of the walls.

A coupla before's:

The hallway closet and the decommissioned laundry chute.  I'm told that back in the day, the Olson kids would dive down the laundry chute to the basement.  I have no doubt if we would have kept it, people who live here probably would have done the same thing.  And our kids would have for sure!

Our goal with this reno was to just have a nice, clean, new bathroom.

Unfortunately, we are keeping this update basic.  Sigh.  BUTT.... That will not be the case on the next project which is going to be.....Ima notta gonna tell you!  How fun would that be if I did?  You'll just have to wait and suite.  I mean see 😉

This guy.... He has it all figured out.  Sioux jersey, paintball mask and a hammer.  What else does a kid need?  Child labor... gotta love it.

GUTTED!  WHEW!

What. A. Mess.

View from dining room

 View from bathroom

Ok... So in this ceiling photo, you can see on the right the outline of what was the spare bedroom closet.  On the far left was the old hallway closet and then going from left to right was the original wall of the bathroom and you can see how tiny that bathroom was.  What you can't see is all of the effing vermiculite that was hiding in the ceiling that we had to haul out once again.  Mad face.

Tub's installed!  Anyone who really knows us will appreciate this photo.  Enough said.

We have walls.  Nice, clean, new, non-plaster, sheet rock walls.

Happy Dance.

Flooring
We went with porcelain tile that has the wood flooring look to it and used this new orange meshy stuff to mortar it to the floor and it worked pretty slick!

We opted not to have heated flooring like we did in the downstairs bathroom due to the fact that I sweat like a whore in church that just ate 12 beef sandwiches when I'm showering and getting ready so... There's that.  Cold floor.  Much better.

Fast forward to 2020...

We did manage to finish the bathroom and no, it did not take us 4 years.  Just 4 years for me to update my blog about it.  I guess it takes a world crisis to get shit done at home...… 😜

The Before's AND After's:

In this photo above, you can see the bit of wall that sticks out between the tub and the closet. That was the original entrance into the bathroom and the linen closet is the space we stole from the adjacent bedroom closet. 👇

 We went with a wood ceiling because, I have no idea.

Pocket door instead of a swinging one to save space as the remodel made the hallway pretty tight.  Bonus: it locks!  Thank you Jesus!

Our vanity custom made by our friends at Northland Custom Woodworking Inc. We still haven't managed to put the hardware on it.  Something tells me that may finally get done in the next few weeks.....

Tah-dah!  There you have it!  Shitters Done!